I found myself talking to a client the other day, trying to bring attention to the feeling content of an experience, rather than the transactional, common day content. This could be described as ‘emotional texture’. Therapy encourages this kind of self-reflection, and it can take some getting used to when you first come to therapy as a client. So often we forget to look within; the world presents us with a constant array of stimulants and with the digital age we can entertain ourselves 24 hours a day, without a thought to what is going on inside ourselves.
Here comes the BUT…we pay a price for that. Depression and anxiety are prevalent throughout the Western world (and beyond); mental health has now taken over physical health as the main reason why people go ‘off sick’ from work in the UK; loneliness is endemic in society and public welfare services are overwhelmed with demand. Demand for what? For attention. For help. For connection. For an opportunity to start to feel better and more in control of life.
Counselling and therapy are certainly not the panacea for all ills. (Another) BUT they do provide a space in which people can focus on themselves and get to sort out what is working in their life and what isn’t; what is important and what isn’t; where they might be giving themselves a hard time or where they are in some emotional pain.
Attention to emotional texture is an opportunity to not just be pushed around by life. It offers the possiblity to cease operating in ways that are little understood or have become embedded over time with no current life value. It can be painful, scary, feel shameful and exposing, but the rewards are great. We are social creatures. Something in the act of speaking from a place a bit unknown, a bit hidden, a bit invisible to another human being in a trusted and safe space is empowering and potent.